


Let’s go play some money on the order of the horses.

by iwantchocopie (hyemiyah)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-11
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-02-20 18:56:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2439263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyemiyah/pseuds/iwantchocopie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jongdae runs into him one afternoon and realises he's in love with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let’s go play some money on the order of the horses.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for [Xingdaes Birthday Prompt Fest](http://xingdaes.livejournal.com/11896.html).

  
Jongdae runs into him one afternoon and realises he's in love with him.  
  
"Long time no see, hyung."  
  
For a quick second, Jongdae sees Yixing freeze in his seat.  
  
"Ah, Jongdae! I never thought I'd met you here," says Yixing. "Do you come to this coffee shop often?" Yixing's smile is sad. Jongdae wants to erase all traces of sadness in him. "They have an excellent hot chocolate."  
  
  


☆  


  
The last time Jongdae saw Yixing was two years ago, when Junmyeon decided to break Yixing's heart once and for all, and Yixing moved out of their flat.  
  
Junmyeon promised he'd keep paying Yixing's share of the rent. Though in the end, what had really bothered Jongdae was the fact that he suddenly started missing Yixing's easy laughter and the soft sound of his guitar echoing through the walls.  
  
  


☆  


  
There aren't many people in the café. Granted, it's a quiet Wednesday morning.  
  
Jongdae takes the seat across Yixing and waits for his buzzer to go off.  
  
"I ordered a matcha latte, though," Jongdae says, “and I do come here often. I live around the area."  
  
"Ah," says Yixing, nodding. He stops looking at Jongdae and stares at the buzzer, as if he could make it come to life just with the power of his mind. Jongdae knows Yixing's avoiding asking about Junmyeon. It makes Jongdae want to run all the way to Junmyeon's fancy apartment in Gangnam, and punch him in the face.  
  
  


☆  


  
It was a cold January morning. Jongdae remembers the snow, falling outside his window.  
  
Yixing and Junmyeon were in the kitchen; they probably didn't even know Jongdae was home. Junmyeon sounded old and tired. Yixing was pretending everything was fine, as he usually did. Sometimes Jongdae thought all Yixing and Junmyeon did in that relationship was pretend. Despite all the effort Yixing put in making Junmyeon forget. Despite all the effort Junmyeon put in moving on.  
  
Alas, Yixing's feelings were genuine. He couldn't say the same about Junmyeon though. His heart had always been somewhere else.  
  
  


☆  


  
Jongdae's buzzer goes off, vibrating and flashing red lights. He stands up and heads to the counter to pick up his drink and his panini sandwich.  
  
Shooting a glance back at Yixing to ask him if he wants something else, he feels his heart contract at the sight. Yixing looks sad and thin, even after all this time. His once blinding smile lost somewhere between the dark circles under his eyes. He's staring at something in the distance.  
  
  


☆  


  
Jongdae meets Junmyeon in his first year of university.  
  
He was looking for a roommate. Jongdae was the first person to show up in the flat inquiring about the flyer he found in the common dorm board.  
  
Junmyeon barely so much as looks at him when he tells Jongdae how much his share of the rent is (cheaper than the dorm), shows Jongdae his room (bigger than the one he is currently living in), and demands to use the shower every morning between 7 and 8 (his current room doesn't even have a bathroom.)  
  
It's a good deal. Jongdae accepts with a big grin. Junmyeon shoots him a sad tiny smile and retreats to his bedroom, after telling him he could move in whenever was convenient.  
  
When Jongdae comes back to the flat with his stuff, Yixing opens the door. He introduces himself as 'Baekhyun's friend,' even though Jongdae has no idea who Baekhyun is. And to be honest, he doesn't care. He likes Yixing's smile and his messy Korean accent.  
  
  


☆  


  
Jongdae returns to the table with his tray and a new buzzer. He remembered Yixing’s love for cakes back then, and hopes this hasn't changed.  
  
"I ordered you a cake, hyung," he says while arranging the tray on the table. "I hope you still like sweets."  
  
"Are you still living with Junmyeon, Jongdae?" asks Yixing, suddenly. And that's the Yixing Jongdae knows best, shooting questions when least expected.  
  
"No, I'm not." Jongdae blows on his mug and takes a sip. "I moved out a month after you left."  
  
"Ah, I see," Yixing says. The buzzer goes off and this time Yixing gets up and walks to the counter. Jongdae waits for him to start eating his sandwich.  
  
  


☆  


  
  
Yixing's the third occupant in the flat. He's Chinese and on a scholarship.  
  
Jongdae asked him what made him chose South Korea, of all places. Yixing's answer was, "It was close to home." Yet, in the time they were living together, Yixing never left the country.  
  
Instead, Jongdae noticed the way Yixing seemed to always be in Junmyeon's space. How Yixing's fingers always seemed to linger in Junmyeon's skin. The way Yixing secretly looked at Junmyeon and the devastating fact that Junmyeon never looked back at him.  
  
  


☆  


  
"Tell me what you have been doing these past couple of years, hyung." Jongdae says, half way through eating his sandwich. "Are you still teaching dance?" Yixing majored in music, but he was good with his feet and worked part time in a dance studio near their university campus.  
  
"No. I compose songs now; ballads." There's a bit of chocolate in the corner of Yixing's mouth, Jongdae grabs a napkin and cleans it for him. "Sad songs," Yixing says, "for sad people."  
  
"Really?" Jongdae is amused; maybe he's heard Yixing's songs in the radio. "Are you famous now, hyung?"  
  
Yixing giggles earnestly. Jongdae takes a mental picture and stores it in his heart. "Don't be ridiculous," Yixing says. But there's a smile on his face. Jongdae feels proud that he’s the one who put it there. "I miss dancing, though. I used to watch ballet specials on television, and drown in the heat of summer."  
  
It's a bit unfair how easily Jongdae can imagine Yixing, sitting alone in front of the television. Starving himself, censuring thoughts. Isolated from the people that care about him and love him unconditionally because of the cancer of not letting go of the one person that doesn't. Another version of Junmyeon, Jongdae thinks.  
  
  


☆  


  
Jongdae learns who Baekhyun is two weeks after he moves to the flat.  
  
They're in Jongdae's room. Jongdae found a white shirt that says 'how to get arrested' in his closet.  
  
"I found this the other day," Jongdae says, showing Yixing the shirt.  
  
"Ah," Yixing says, walking up to where Jongdae is and touching the fabric. "This is Baekhyun's." Jongdae inhales the smell of soap radiates off of Yixing's body.  
  
"Exactly who is this Baekhyun dude?" Yixing doesn't seem to know the meaning of personal space. He's so close Jongdae can see the tiny blemishes on Yixing's cheek. "Who wears a shirt like this one?"  
  
"You should've seen the sweater that said 'dopeshit'." Yixing's smiling fondly at the shirt and rubbing his thumb against it. This makes Jongdae uncomfortable, somehow. So he walks to the other side of the room.  
  
"He sounds like he could really get arrested," Jongdae says, grabbing his textbook from the desk.  
  
"He's fun," says Yixing. "I love Baekhyun." This takes Jongdae by surprise. It shouldn't, though, because Yixing loves everybody. "He and Junmyeon used to date."  
  
"Oh." Jongdae doesn't really know what to say about that. Yixing's looking a little sad all of a sudden. His eyes fixed on something that isn't the shirt anymore. Jongdae climbs on the bed with his textbook and tries to sound as nonchalant as possible. "Come on, hyung. You promised you'd help with my Mandarin homework."  
  
"Ah, yes." Yixing says, coming back to reality and sitting on the bed next to Jongdae.  
  
  


☆  


  
Jongdae's sipping his second mug of matcha latte. Yixing's choice, this time, is a caramel macchiato.  
  
"Being a teacher suits you." Yixing's carefully blowing on his drink. It's cute. Jongdae feels the urge to touch him, to make it all okay.  
  
"Same for you," Jongdae says, remembering his old Mandarin textbook full of Yixing's doodles. "You were a great teacher."  
  
Yixing looks up from his drink and offers Jongdae a soft smile. "Is Junmyeon okay?"  
  
It's not fair, Jongdae thinks. Yixing's so oblivious and so incredibly loyal. And here’s Jongdae, trying to offer him his heart. He ponders at this last thought, for a moment, and realises maybe he's been offering his heart since the very beginning.  
  
"He's alright. I ran into him about a month ago, in Chanyeolie's store." Jongdae's fidgeting with a napkin. Yixing's sitting across the table and Jongdae is in love with him. He's close but Jongdae can't seem to reach him. "He bleached his hair. Almost didn't recognise him."  
  
Yixing chuckles cheerfully. "Tell me he looks hideous."  
  
"He does." He doesn't, not really. But Yixing doesn't need to know that.  
  
"You know, I saw a boy that looked exactly like him earlier." Yixing's blowing on his mug again. "Younger, but with the same hair, when it was messy and uncut. And he had the same eyes, where you couldn't distinguish the pupil because of the darkness, and almost the same jawline, and the same hands, and the same colour of skin." He pauses, takes a sip of his drink and makes a delighted noise. "I wanted to stop him. I wanted to tell him that someone that looked like him has forgotten me, has broken my heart. But he just sat there. He sat there and sat there and I wanted to look away but I couldn't. Then you came in."  
  
Yixing's still flesh, Jongdae notices, holding on to life with feelings. Yixing's beautiful and he's here, and Jongdae is madly in love with him.  
  
"He is leaving now," Yixing says, looking past Jongdae at Junmyeon's doppelgänger. "He doesn't even know, and I'm still here."  
  
"I'm right here with you, hyung." Jongdae says, sincerely. He reaches out for Yixing's hand and squishes it gently. "I'm here."  
  
"Yes, you are." Yixing's finally looking at Jongdae.  
  
  


☆  


  
"I want to help him get better, Jongdae," Yixing's sprawled on Jongdae's bed.  
  
There are people who don't want to get better. Jongdae's found out Junmyeon is one of them, but he doesn't have the heart to say that to Yixing. "You can't heal everyone, hyung," he says, instead. "Now come help me."  
  
"Sometimes I think you just like to keep me around so I can do your homework for you." Yixing says, still not moving.  
  
"You don't do my homework, hyung. You help me do it." Jongdae’s a bit offended.  
  
"Baekhyun kept me around because I thought he was awesome." Jongdae rolls his eyes. He's tired of Yixing talking about this Baekhyun dude. "You keep me around because I do your homework." Yixing gets up and sits next to Jongdae. Then he adds, in Mandarin, "Unreliable little brothers."  
  
"Hey, I caught that. I'm not unreliable." Jongdae's truly offended now. He stops writing and drops his pencil on the table as dramatically as he can. "Don't compare me to that dopeshit guy."  
  
Yixing laughs at Jongdae's little tantrum. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. You're my new favourite dongsaeng, Jongdae. Cross my heart and hope to die."  
  
  


☆  


  
It's cold when they get out of the coffee shop. Jongdae holds out his hand and Yixing takes it.  
  
"My place?" Jongdae asks.  
  
"Or mine," Yixing says, "I live around here, too."  
  
"Or yours."  
  
It doesn't matter which, Jongdae thinks, as long as Yixing lets him hold his hand. What matters is now.  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you Alicia, for your patience and for looking over this. And thank you Princess Eleonore, for putting up with my whiny whines.


End file.
